One of the biggest errors of self-help writers is to dive into writing their books, before they’ve healed from the wounds they are teaching others to overcome. If you’re still reeling from pain, shame, or blame, you may not be ready to tell your story as part of your self-help or spiritual book.
Think about it: readers are looking to be uplifted and inspired. They want to learn how to overcome the obstacles they confront. They want, through your writing, to have a deeper and fuller experience of life. If you haven’t yet dealt in your own life–on a deep and sustainable level–with the issues that you’re writing about, you may end up doing more harm than good. At the very least, you will struggle to connect with readers looking for hope and solutions.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t share your deepest and darkest secrets and most painful experiences. It is only that, when you do, you want to share them from a place of wholeness and healing. When someone writes from the other side of a traumatic event, having made peace with their past, it’s an amazing thing to experience. We feel blessed in some deep way. Above all, we have been gifted with hope.
So before you reveal–do your inner work. Heal. Not perfectly, perhaps. But sufficiently to be a bright light to others.